A look back to 12/14/2007
written by Maggie Ann.
at Saturday, September 27, 2008
Finally found an old writing/performance I am proud of. Read it here.
Read More...
Believe in lovely!
written by Maggie Ann.
at Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Something that gave me hope this morning!
Read about it here.
Ps. I've practically moved, have you updated your feeds and links :) ?
I'll be redirecting soon dearest ones.
What makes me happy?
written by Maggie Ann.
at Monday, September 22, 2008
Find out here!
Read More...Leaves that spin as they hit the ground.
written by Maggie Ann.
at Thursday, September 18, 2008
I wrote over here.
Read More...It still hurts.
written by Maggie Ann.
at Monday, September 15, 2008
Posted here too, please update feeds and links, I'm moving soon.
How could I know something so small could affect me so big?
Stopping merely to get some gas, I've been driving for about a week with the gas light on.
I have to walk inside to pay, because I've only got cash left over from the farmer's market--
where we shop for fresh produce that normally we couldn't afford. We've been eating so much healthier,
nothing pre-processed. Fresh fresh fresh.
I step in line behind two people. One a girl maybe a little younger than me, old enough to buy alcohol, and she does.
She is buying a fifth of Captain Morgan, rum. Behind her, a guy, probably about the same age, maybe a little younger. He's buying two big fountain drinks. I can see they are not filled to capacity, there is still room left, to pour in the rum. He is old enough to buy a pack of cigarettes. He does. She is giddy. Giggly, happy about her purchase it seems. About the idea that soon they will consume and be consumed by intoxication.
I step to the counter, say $10.03, and hand over my ten dollar bill and the three pennies I've fished from my console. I walk away. I'm thinking about the girl, and the boy. I'm thinking about the guys I saw on my drive to the gas station, sitting on their front porch, the yard in front of them littered with cups, one lights a cigarette and the other takes a swig of beer, it is 4:00 in the afternoon. I think about what alcohol used to be for me. The relationship we were in. How I loved myself more when it was inside me, how I loved others more and how everything felt so much better. I think about the crave I feel towards it, and about how if I did succumb to that crave it would drown the flower that is blooming in my heart. I think about those who can drink responsibly. I think about the artists that have made their fame with their relationship to this lover. I feel used up and confused. I feel sad, a mourning for the person I used to be-- cool like that, alcohol and drugs, coffee and cigarettes. And I can tell myself over and over, that this is the right path (in my heart I know it is), but it doesn't take the loss away. It doesn't take it away, I think, only time can do that. Time and patience and self love that I could never get from a bottle. It still hurts.
September's Full Moon Dreamboard--
written by Maggie Ann.
at Sunday, September 14, 2008
(click to view at full size)Last month's dreamboard was all about action, about allowing my heart-passions to move me. I feel that those dreams were manifest. The growth that took place over the last month is incredible. I have begun to see powerful shifting in the energy I engage in with my environment.
When thinking about what I dream for this month I can see that I am lying within the blue prints of the mature plant that I would to become. I feel that plans have been layed and that the journey set before me follows a path that I am beginning more and more to uncover and understand. I feel like a little seed amidst fertile soil, with lots of internal nourishment and growth happening. I feel that I am beginning, slowly, to emerge from the seed casing and the first shoots of energy are poking into the soil. I really love that the first shoot into the ground from a seed is called the radicle. These past few days the term "Radical Self-Acceptance" has been running around in my head. I feel this month is about continuing to allow the growth to happen, however fast or slow it sees fit. I trust the blue print and my spiritual biology-- which is the path my heart sees.
The text around my painting is a portion of lyrics from one of my favorite musicians, Trevor Hall. In his song To Zion he says,
Plant the seed, watch it sprout, watch it grow, watch it bloom, get in tune.
That is my dream for this month. Amen-- be it so.
P.S. I'm in the process of moving-- http://mostsincerely.squarespace.com, start updating your feeds and links :)
while cleaning out an old purse:
written by Maggie Ann.
at Thursday, September 11, 2008
a poem, written about this time two years ago:
each on another
coffee stained sort of color
nicotine like fit--
twenty oz. morning.
awake as a state of grace,
chemicals flowing.
dehydrated lips
sting with each sip
burning tongue tip.
